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The Jane Report

by Dom and Jane posted Sep 24 2013 6:10AM

 
Paul McCartney was on Jimmy Kimmel last night, and Jimmy asked him to talk about the first song he ever wrote with John Lennon.  That got Paul into a great story about how he and the other Beatles used to be completely CLUELESS about women.  He said the first song they wrote together was "I Saw Her Standing There".  Jimmy asked if it came from a true story, and Paul said the guys never used to get girls when they were young.  They'd go to dances and sit around all night daring each other to ask girls to dance, and no one ever got up the nerve until it was too late. 
 
 
Paul told Jimmy about one of his recurring dreams, which involves him playing with The Beatles and having the whole audience start leaving.  Jimmy asks if that has EVER happened to Paul, and Paul says it hasn't. 
 
Then to wrap it up, Paul played on "Jimmy Kimmel Live" last night.  But not in the studio.  They closed off Hollywood Boulevard and put up a stage in the middle of the street.  
 
Bill Clinton was on Letterman and said he honestly doesn't know what Hillary's plans are.  He said she's working on finishing her book and setting up a new project, and they're also 'having a lot of fun' and trying to be normal.  He also said we shouldn't focus on her plans, and we should pay attention instead to trying to get the country back on track.  
 
Then, Justin Timberlake was on Leno. JT did the interview with a sinus infection.  Jay mentioned it, and Justin started talking about all the other times he's performed when he was sick.  First he says he's on performance-enhancing drugs, but he's talking about antibiotics.  Then he talks about shows he's done where he ran off stage to vomit every time the lights went down.
 
Kanye West just gave another crazy interview.  He can't really say anything crazier than what he's already said, so he's basically just repeating all the old crazy stuff in new ways.  Here's what he thinks about rap music and pop culture nowadays: he says rap is the new rock music, and rappers are the new rock stars.  And he's the biggest rock star of all. 
 
Neil Patrick Harris is good for business!  The 65th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards' three-hour telecast, hosted by the How I Met Your Mother star, attracted 17.3 million viewers and a 4.3 demo rating, the show's largest audience since 2005, and its best demo rating since Conan O'Brien hosted in 2006. Harris even bested himself as the 2009 telecast, which he hosted, only brought in 13.3 million viewers.  Compared to the Jimmy Kimmel-hosted 2012 Emmys, this year's show was up 33 percent in viewers and 26 percent in the all-important demo. Of course, Harris did receive some help in his quest for ratings domination.
 
Robert Pattinson reportedly has a new girlfriend.  He was spotted at a friend's birthday party Saturday night with a "mystery brunette."  A witness says, quote, "Their hands were all over each other."  The source adds, quote, "She's really sweet and [has a] girl next door vibe.  Rob is actually really nice and humble.  They're a perfect match."
 
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09/24/2013 6:26AM
The Jane Report
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